Another Ironic Post

-          Why are waitresses always in such a hurry to run away from the table the second that they give you the check.  Just let me pay and get out of there!

-          When I was young I used to wonder what the word “Voidware” meant when they’d always say it on television commercials.  Then I realized that “Void Where Prohibited” is a three word statement.

-          I find it hilarious that some Subways have different breads.  Do people in Kansas City really not like Monterrey Cheddar?

-          On airplanes, why are the lips on the cup holders on tray tables so small?  It’s like they just had a little kid draw a circle in the corner and say, “Your Drink Here.”  There’s barely even an indent there.  Any minor bump and that drink is slip sliding into your lap.

-          I’m sure there’s a story behind this, but why is one screwdriver called a flathead and the other called a Phillips?  If I was a screwdriver I’d want to be a Phillips, I bet they have better parties.

-          With these rising gas prices, it’s making it a lot tougher to get that perfect pump to an even dollar amount.  I get excited when I nail it right on……..and then my excitement is quickly depleted when I realize that I’m paying $64 to fill up my car.

-          I recently drove to Minneapolis and had a pesky fly in the car the whole way up.  Every time I would think that I got him out of the window, he would re-appear.  Not only was he terribly annoying, but that little bastard got a free ride to Minneapolis out of it too.  At least when he finally got out when I got there he was probably like, where the h*ll am I?

-          I’ve seen a few speed signs over the years that say, “End 30 MPH Speed Zone.”  Need I even ask why they don’t just put up a “Speed Limit” sign instead?

-          It’s funny how a water bottle is something that you keep for repeat use, and how a bottled water is one time use.

-          The worst non-accident thing that can happen to you in the car is for you to go through a drive thru and for them to forget to give you a straw.

Wouldn’t it be weird to be a storm chaser and cheer for bad weather all of the time?  That’d be like those car repair shops that cheer for accidents on the morning traffic report.  Actually, I don’t know if they do that but I would just for fun if I was them.

-          I laughed to myself the first time that I saw one of those Best Buy Express vending machines at the airport, wondering who would ever buy anything from one of those?  On the trip back, that guy was me.  I had been meaning to buy a car phone charger for months, and it saved me a trip.  Now that was ironic in the correct sense of the word.